juggling act

ANDY: I need some sugar.
ANNA: I've got a mandarin?
SIM: I've got two...
ANDY: [confidently] You can throw them all at the same time - I can juggle.

*THUD*

SIM: Did you drop it?
ANDY: [defensively] Well you didn't say that one was the size of a bloody house...

a match made in heaven

"Concave, concave..." ANDY muttering incomprehensibly. "Y'know, if you mixed Con the Fruiterer and Nick Cave, you'd get concave..."

third time's a charm

ABBEY: …and a tasteless vegie burger…
SIM: You make that sound really appetising.
ANDY: [popping his head up over the cubicle wall] Yeah you make it sound really… abbeytising [turns to Cassy looking pleased with himself] Write that down, eh? Eh?
CASSY: No, Andy, that’s not funny. It’s just lame.

LATER...

Beeeep. Beeeep. Beeeep.
ANDY: Abbey? Well, Abb-ey damned, the microwave’s finished!
ABBEY: [unimpressed] Have you been sitting on that one for awhile?
ANDY: Nah, it just came to me. Like an abbey-rition…[Cassy gives up, heads back to Andyisms and selects Create New Post]

the long & short of it

ANDY: [eyeing an email on Cassy's screen] Woah! Who's that for?
CASSY: A friend...
ANDY: It's big enough! What is it, a novel?
CASSY: It's not that big, it's just a really long paragraph.
ANDY: A paragraph? [scornfully] That's not a paragraph. You could fold that into seven bits and make a paper plane, that’s how big it is...